Monday, October 4, 2021

ON THE BOAT

ON THE BOAT



     It did not take very long for me to get to know all 16 boys who were emigrating to Australia with the Big Brother Movement. The reason for this was that we only had two cabins between us. Also, there was an ESCORT OFFICER who was to accompany us on the journey to make sure we didn’t get into any sort of trouble. He was also available to give us as much information as possible on our new home.

   

    Our daily routine consisted of getting up at 6 O’clock every morning. At 7 O’clock we were expected to run around the ship at least 5 or 6 times. After that the Escort Officer  took us all for P.T.which consisted of push-ups, pull-ups and various other exercises which were meant to keep us sound in body and mind, in other words, it stopped most boys from going nuts while we spent 7 weeks at sea.


    The food on board ship was remarkably good as far as I was concerned. Every day there was a change in menu and we had at least a couple of choices as to what we would like to eat. The dining room was quite large so the mealtimes were broken up into two sessions. Tables were allotted to everyone so no one had to worry about missing out on a meal or fighting for a place at the table.


     The Aurelia was registered in Italy so all the ships crew, including the waiters were Italian. Our waiter, who served us throughout the whole trip a small, handsome man called Usepi. No matter what the conditions were like at sea, Usepi always had a kind work for all of us boys and he usually wore a good smile on his face.


   “What it will be today Boysss?”, he said as he handed us all menus. “The roast-a the biff taista very the good-a and the fish-a is not a the bad-a.”, he’d say in his thick Italian accent. 


      It was on the second evening that we entered the Bay of Biscay. I had only ever been on a small fishing boat before and not that far out to sea, so I couldn’t see the land. When the ship started to roll around from the 20 foot high waves I found it very exciting. The large ship would roll up to the top of a giant wave and then down the other side it would go. Sometimes it would roll sideways as it went up and down. On many occasions our plates of food would go sliding off the table if we did not hang on to it. Glasses of water and wine would spill all over the clean white tablecloths. Some people would be throwing  up as they tried to navigate their way down the steps to their cabins. 


     Myself and a few other boys went upstairs onto the deck to see the size of the huge waves. When the ship rolled down the side of a big black foaming wave all we could see towering above our heads was a wall of water. It was not long before a deck-hand spotted us hanging onto a railing. He came over to us and yelled to us to go back inside as it was too dangerous to be out on deck tonight. Just as were going back inside a large wave crashed over the side of the ship and drenched us all through. Gallons of water hit the top deck, then ran off the sides as the old ship reared up and rode another wave.

   

  When we got back down to the dining room where the other boys were still sitting and hanging on tight to the table, it looked as though a herd of cattle had run rampant through the place. The floor was covered with broken glass. Broken plates of food, knives, forks and spoons were sliding all over the place and to top the whole scene off, people were throwing up everywhere.  

“Look at that old girl over there chucking up her guts.”, said a Liverpool lad. 

 “Oh look at that young bint.”, said a Geordie boy. “She just heaved it all back on the tablecloth.”     

“Have a butchers hook at that small kid over there.”, said a London Cockney lad. “He’s just having a big yawn all over his mothers lap!” 

I had never seen so many people throwing up all at the same time. The dining room scene made us all laugh like hell. Then all of a sudden, one of our boys came stumbling towards us us on his way out to the toilet. His face was white with a slight tinge of green around the bottom of his jaws.

     “Look out boys!”, said a Midlands lad, “He’s going to try and dump it in our shoes and turn-ups!” 

     We gave him as wide a berth as possible. 

     “Let’s go and help him. He looks really sick.”, I said.

     “Bugger you Titch.”, said the Liverpool lad. “You can help him if you like but I’m not risking him chucking up on mi good drain-pipe trousers. I bought these especially for the trip and I’ve only had ‘em on once and already there’s some warm bile and carrots stuck to ‘em!”


     That evening, as I lay on mi top bunk, I could see the giant waves out of the porthole window that was level with my pillows. The Aurelias’ engines growled, hummed and vibrated all night long. It was a bit hard to rest that first couple of nights but after about a week at sea it began to feel really good going to rest and listen to the nonstop sound of the ships droning engines. Those first few nights were the worst weather we experienced and from then on it was quite a pleasant trip. 


     Every morning I would look out of the porthole and all I could see was water. Every evening before resting, all I could see out of the porthole window was more water. The movie out of that window never changed for about 12 days at sea.


     During the day we lads would amuse ourselves by playing table tennis and coyts out on the top deck. We had a golden rule that was agreed upon before we played ping-pong. Whoever smashed the ball over the side into the ocean had either to go get it or buy another one. Since the first option was out of the question the latter one was always enforced. Although the balls were not very expensive, some lads lost quite a few shillings of their spending money on that trip.  At the end of the journey we were all skillled ping-pong players.


     Some days, all we would do was sit around in the deck chairs reading magazines, smoking fags and drinking fizzy pop. One of the Escort Officers’ rules was, no Little Brother was allowed to consume alcohol on board the ship. This did not stop some of the older boys who were 18. They promptly told the Escort Officer to “go to hell and back! 

      “We’re not fuckin’ kids, so don’t try to bung it on with me or I’ll give you a fucking good stoush.”, said Bob, the Liverpuddlian.  A few days later Bob and the Officer had a big scuffle so the Captain of the ship had Bob thrown in the Brig until he sobered up and cooled down.


     There was a geeky, red-haired boy who was part of our group. We all called him ‘Ginger’, as a nickname. Ginger was always bragging about how tough he was. One day as he lay on his upper bunk bed with his arm hanging over the side, a couple of the older boys gave it a right good whack on their way past which resulted in a broken arm for Ginger. From that day on I wouldn’t say he was quiet but he never bragged out his toughness any more and his arm remained in a cast for the rest of the trip.


     Life on board ship really suited me. I loved the wide open spaces and at nighttime I would sit out on the deck in one of the chairs. The air, although cold at times, was fresh and pure just like the air and winds on my beloved Yorkshire Moors.


     As soon as we sailed into warmer waters we would see all sorts of ocean life. One day we saw a large school of Flying Fish. They would literally fly about 3 or 4 feet through the air as they swam along side of the big Liner. Someone said they were after the scraps of food that were tossed overboard after each mealtime. On another occasion I saw a school of wild porpoises that jumped and frolicked in the clear blue water. They looked very much like they were smiling as they swam and played for hours on end. Sometime they would all dive out of sight and then come up out of the water on the other side of the ship. When we raced over to the opposite side they would make their laughing sound as they lept out of the blue water. It was like they were saying HA! HAA!, we fooled you stupid boys.


     Some of our evenings were spent in the lounge bar. The ship had its own Italian 5 -piece band that used to play for a couple of hours every evening. On quite a few occasions I played my trumpet with them. I only knew a few Italian songs and they knew 2 or 3 Jazz songs but all in all everyone enjoyed themselves and we all had a good time. 


     One evening, as we all sat around a few tables listening to the band and watching some of the other passengers dance, a boy in our group decided to get drunk. Just for a joke, some of the other lads spiked his beers with some hard liquor. Towards the end of the evening he became quite violent so the Escort Officer and a couple of the ships crew had to muscle him out of the lounge and tie him to his bed for his own sake. Even at the bests of times, he was not what I would call a stable-minded boy and the overindulgence of alcohol didn’t do anything to enhance his intelligence. From that night onwards the cocktail bar staff were under strict orders from the Captain not to serve more than 3 drinks to each boy who was 17 and over. Thee oldest boy in our group were 18 and I was the youngest at 15. While I may very well have been the youngest and smallest there was no doubt in my mind, whatsoever, that for sure I displayed the most intelligence.

   

     Our first stop on the journey was to be Port Said. Although we were not allowed to disembark, we stayed there for a day while the ship loaded up with fresh fruit, food, meat and fresh drinking water.


     The native people who live in Port Said would row their small boats over to the side of the huge liner. Their boats were full of all the junky stuff that tourists are notorious for buying. Standing in their boats they would throw up a rope with a basket tied to the end of it. Whatever some of the passengers wanted to buy was placed in the basket and hoisted up the side of the ship and over the rail. The money was then put in the center of the basket and sent back down to the man in the small, loaded-down boat. One of our boys decided he would like a small trinket he saw in one of the vendors small boat. The vendor placed the item in the basket and sent the trinket up the side of the Liner, on the rope. Once the money was in the vendors hands it got really sticky, he did not want to give it back. So the boy ordered another item from the boat. The vendor tied the large leather suitcase to the rope and the boy pulled it up on deck.

     “Two more English Pounds!”, said the native.

     “Fuck you!”, yelled the boy and took off with the suitcase.

     The Arab vendor was furious. He climbed up one of the ships large thick ropes that anchored it to the buoys. In his teeth he gripped a large sheath knife and I could hear him cursing and swearing in his own language. As he climbed over the ships railing the older British immigrants, who up till that point had been having a good time, all scattered in various directions when they saw the knife between the mans’ teeth.

     ‘It’s just like watching a pirate movie’, I thought, as I backpedaled away from the angry vendor.

     “Someone get the Captain!”,yelled one of the passengers. 

      The man ran between the crowds of people and made his way down the first flight of stairs to look for the boy. The Purser and a couple of Dock Police caught the man and muscled him down the side of the ship and back into his small boat. 

     

     “I’m not finished with that thieving Arab bastard yet!” said the boy. 

     “What are you planning to do about it?”, I said.

     “Come with me and I’ll show you.”

     Three of us boys followed him as he made his way back down to our cabin.

     “What are you up to Dave?”, I said as we all trooped into the cabin.

     “Just watch this, Titch.”, he said to me.

     He walked over to the bunks, then climbed up on the top one. He opened the porthole and stuck his head out.

     “Just as I thought. Get me a large jug of water, Titch.”

     After I filled up the jug I said, “What are you going to do with this ?”

     “Open that other porthole and stick your head out.”

     Looking out of my porthole I could not believe my eyes. Straight below me about 20 feet down and 10 feet to my right was the Arab vendors small boat. As soon as I saw the boat I knew what Dave had in mind. 

     “When I throw the jug of water on the thieving bastard, pull your head in Titch and close your porthole.”

     Dave emptied the large jug of water all over the Arabs’ head and we pulled our heads back through the porthole and closed it tight.

     “That will fix the bastard!”, said Dave. “And just for luck, I’ll give him another.”

The large jug was filled to the brim with water again. Then Dave opened he porthole and instead of dropping the water first, he yelled down to the vendor, “Have a drink of water you thieving Arab bastard!”  As I watched from my porthole I saw the large jug of water hit the Arab right on his head.

     “I fucking kill you white bastard!”, he yelled up to Dave.

     “Your mother fucks donkeys, you Arab bastard”, yelled Dave.


     Now this little interchange really got the Arab mad. He pulled his knife out of his belt and threw it straight up at the porthole window where Daves’ head was hanging out of. As Dave pulled his head back in, the knife bounced 2 inches from his right ear.

     “Fucking hell, that was close.”, said Dave. “I felt the wind of that knife as it bounced off the side.”

     “I think that’s enough Dave. Someone is going to get hurt really bad if you don’t stop now.”

     “OK Titch, perhaps you’re right.”

     “It’s not worth getting a knife stuck in the middle of your head.”, I said as we closed the portholes.

    “Let’s go back upstairs.”, said Dave


     When we got back to the top deck we very carefully peered over the side from another position, further along the rail. The Arab vendor was still cursing and screaming while shaking his fists at the other passengers.

     The Arab vendors’ boats pulled away from the big liner. The ships large tie-off ropes were removed. The monstrous large diesel engines slowly droned back to life and once again we were moving.


     Before long,the Purser announced to all the passengers that we would be going through the Suez Canal. He said it would be a wonderful experience for the passengers who were interested in taking photographs.

     The Suez Canal was much wider and longer that a Yorkshire lad would have been able to imagine.  It looked somewhat like a big river but for the fact there didn’t seem to be any current. Arabs, dressed in their traditional white robes, rode their camels alongside the Canal and at various different locations small dredging operations were ongoing.  

   

     Once we were through the Canal and back out at Sea we headed for Aden which was to be our next stop. The weather was now really warm so we boys spent a lot of our time swimming in the ships’ pool. The pool itself was not very large but there was always enough room to have a good time messing around.

     Myself and a few of the boys devised some games such as water-soccer, fighting and dunking and diving from the pools’ small springboard. The springboard was a lot of fun and as the days rolled by we all became quite good at somersault diving, back-flips and jackknifes. Throwing a shiny shilling or two-bob piece into the pool and diving down to get it became one of my best games.



     On board, there was a German family who was emigrating to Australia with their two teenage children. Their young daughter was about 16 so the older boys were always trying to chat her up. The main obstacle to their success was that she didn’t speak any English. Her older brother who was probably around 17 had a short crewcut, a fat face and weighed about 14 stone. The older boys had a lot of fun trying to teach ‘Fritz’, as they called him, English. As you may well guess, Fritz was not interested in learning the Queens English. He was more interested in foul language and the boys were more than willing to help him in his educational endeavor. For example, sometimes ‘Fritzie’ would come over to our table in the cocktail bar of an evening.

     “Hello Fritzie, you big, fat, squat-headed Hun.”, one of the boys would say.

Fritzie had no idea whatsoever what the boy was saying, so he pulled up a chair, sat down and started to smile. One of the other older boys would say, “Hey Fritzie, fucky, fucky your sister.” Fritzie would light up with a big smile and nod his head in agreement, although he had no idea of what he was smiling for or agreeing to.

      One evening, one of the boys taught Fritzie to say, in English, ‘Will you please fuck with me.’ He then pointed Fritzi in the direction of one of the younger female passengers. It was quite hilarious to watch really. While the band was playing and the passengers were all dancing, Fritz goes up to this young girl who was about 19, smiles at her and offers her his hand whilst saying, “Would you like to fuck with me?” The young girl got up from her table and red-faced she made a swift exit. 

      Later, the Purser, whom we all knew quite well by now, came over to our table and said, “All right boys, a joke is a joke but I think this little joke has gone quite far enough. Please see to it that it doesn’t happen again.”


     There were quite a few young teenage girls traveling on our ship, but most of them were accompanied by their parents, who kept a good eye on them. While the parents were not looking the girls would eye up us boys as we all sprawled around a couple of tables of a night time. It was obvious from their behavior that they had watched one too many ship-board romance movies. A couple of white lace handkerchiefs were accidentally-on-purpose dropped by our tables when the girls walked past. Seeing as there was no chance whatsoever of being alone with them the white lace handkerchiefs stayed where they were for the cleaners to pick up.


     The entertainment staff devised many a night of fun and games for the passengers to play. We all wore paper party hats and generally sat there taking the mickey out of the old couples who were trying to participate in the games and have some young fun.


     Our Escort officer had latched onto a very pretty woman of about 30. Each mealtime he would sit at the dinner table with the young woman and her old mother. He was really acting out the part of an English Gentleman by placing the chairs for them as they sat down at the table. For the rest of the meal he would entertain them with his well-educated accent and a few after-dinner stories.

      I got to know the daughter quite well over the 7 weeks. She felt quite motherly towards me as I was quite small and only 15. She was a very good-looking woman so I did not mind her attentions at all. Whenever I was sat around the swimming pool, on my own, she would pull up a deck chair and sit next to me for hours. We read magazines and smoked as we lounged away the hours of sunshine. 

     One day she said to me, “I’d better go now Richard. I don’t want your Escort Officer to get more jealous than he already is. He doesn’t thinks its a wise decision for me to spend so much time with you because of our age difference plus when I’m sat here with you, he’s walking around the ship on his own like a lost hush-puppy.”


     One day, the Escort Officer said to me, “Don’t you think you’re spending a bit too much time with Patricia, Titch?”

     “No.”, said one of the older boys. “He’s not, but it’s obvious to us that you’re not spending enough time with her!” 

     We all laughed out loud as he shrank with embarrassment and slithered off back downstairs.

     “That told him.”, said the boy. “He’s just a jealous old bastard, Titch. Don’t you pay any attention to him. Paricia seems to like you very much, so don’t let that old fart ruin your good friendship with her.”


     By the time we had been at Sea for a month, I noticed most of the passengers had put on a lot of weight. I guess it was understandable really, because all everyone did was eat, drink and make merry. During the day we’d all just lay around on deck like well-fed Sea-lions.

     One morning, the Purser announced that we would be passing over the Equator at around 11 O’clock, so for all of those who were interested, there would be a small party around the swimming pool. At 11, King Neptune came up out of the ocean and over the side railing and the party began. King Neptune was really one of the ships’ crewman who had volunteered to play the part and he was really good at it. He wore a gaudy robe covered in shell jewelry, a long wavy beard and wig and a cardboard replica of a trident.

     “I am King Neptune.”, he said. “I am King of all the Oceans. I came on board today to give each and everyone of you mortals a ritual bath. So who wants to go first?”

     A young man volunteered. King Neptune dipped the large shaving brush into the warm soapy water then proceeded to scrub the man with his brush from head to toe. After this part of the ritual was over, two of King Neptunes’ courtiers grabbed the man by the arms and legs and threw him into the swimming pool. We all had a great old party that afternoon and as soon as there were no more volunteers left, King Neptunes men grabbed a couple of young bikini-clad girls and soaped them up. “One, two, three!”, roared the crowd and into the pool they went.


     Our next stop on the long voyage was to be Aden. On the morning we arrived, four small tug-boats came out to meet our Liner. Long, thick ropes were thrown down to the tugs and securely fastened. The tug-boat pilots were experts at maneuvering the large ship through the small channel and into the docking berth.


     That afternoon, about lunchtime, our Escort  Officer called a meeting in one of the cabins.

     “We’ll be staying in Aden for a few days boys while the ship takes on more fuel and supplies for the rest of the journey. We will not be stopping again until we reach Freemantle, Australia. Everyone will be allowed to leave the ship this afternoon  For those of you who decide to go, do not forget you travel document and be very careful walking around. Do not go anywhere by yourselves because foreign ports can be quite dangerous and we don’t want to lose anyone.

     “Where’s Liverpool  Bob?”, said one of the boys.

     “Bob will not be allowed to leave the boat as he has caused far too much trouble. The Captain and I agreed it will be better for him to stay on board.”

     Our group of boys did not like this decision so a loud roar of disapproval erupted from everyone of us.


     I really enjoyed myself in Aden for the few days we were there. We just wandered all around the streets looking at the old buildings and watching how the local people lived. Nighttime was quite an eye-opener for me. At one point we looked past a large building with round, stone pillars. All around the outside wall of the building were hundreds of street beggars who were sleeping in small groups on the ground. They had no possessions whatsoever except for what they wore and an old dirty old blanket to keep them warm.

     At 15 years old I had never seen anything like that in my whole life. It reminded me of the times when mi mother used to say, “You have no idea how lucky you are my boy. Some people don’t even have a bed to sleep in.” I could now see for myself, first hand experience, that her words were true.

     One of the other things I noticed was the lack of dogs in the streets. Instead of street dogs, the dirty streets were crowded with thin, scrawny-looking goats. My heart and compassion were working overtime as I walked those streets. The more streets we walked around, I had the distinct feeling that I had lived in this place at some other time. Plus the fact that wherever we walked I kept recognizing certain buildings and people. I was not brought up with the concept of reincarnation so I had no explanation as to the phenomena that was happening to me. Sometimes I would lapse into a trance-like state as I stared down certain streets or up at the surrounding hills.

     “Are you alright Titch?”, said on of mi pals.

     “Oh yes.”, I said as I came back to the present. “I was just seeing an old movie go through mi mind.”

      At one of the street-vendors stalls I saw a triangular,red piece of jewelry that was edged with silver twisted wire. In the center of the red triangular stone was a few strange markings. I do not know what it was about that piece of jewelry but it felt like I’d owned it before and intuitively I was very attracted to the marks and symbols on it, so I bargained with the Arab vendor and bought it from him for about 5 shillings. I wore that triangular medallion for the rest of the voyage and when we got to Freemantle I packed it up carefully and sent it back home to mi mum.


     That evening, back on board the ship, all the boys were displaying the cheap wrist- watches they had purchased from the street vendors. 

     “Look at this!”, said Angus. “This cost 5 Quid in Aberdeen and I got it off one of those Arabs for 10 Bob. It’s a pretty good deal, eh?” 

      Eight hours later the watch had stopped and refused to go again. After Angus prized off the back with his small penknife, he discovered that all the jewels had been picked out of their sockets. The 17 jewel watch was now a no-jewel watch and no matter how much he shook and banged it,the watch refused to go, so out of disgust and frustration he threw the watch over the side of the ship and into the dirty harbor waters. Four other boys bought themselves a flash-looking watch but within 8 hours they all ended up in the same place.When one boy bought a watch on the street, he said to the vendor, “Does it go or have all the jewels been taken out?”

     “No, no this first-class watch. You listen Mister.”, he said  

     The vendor put the watch against the boys’ ear. The boy smiled as he listened to it tick away quite nicely.

     “OK, I’ll take it for 10 Bob.”

     He handed the street vendor 10 Bob and the vendor gave him the watch and then disappeared in a flash. When the boy put the watch up to his hear it was as dead as a Dodo. Just for the hell of it he took the back off and when he got it open there was no trace of innards in it

     Later on, the boy was telling one of the ships’ waiters about the watch. The waiter started to laugh. 

     “Why are you laughing?”, said the boy.

     “I’m-a sorry young-a man but I got caught like-a that before myself-a. Those Arabs have a long thumbnail and they’re very clever at making a ticking sound with it between the winder and the case.”

      We all had a great laugh over that one.


      The Aurelia Liner was now refueled and restocked with food, fruit and water. The 4 dumpy tug boats pulled her back out to the harbour exit and once again we were headed for the high seas.


      For the next 10 days we never saw land as we crossed the Dead Sea.


     By the time we had been at sea for 7 weeks we were all glad to see the West Coast of Australia. Our first port of call was Fremantle. I felt a lot of excitement as we got closer and closer to land and at long last the Australian tug boats made their way out to the liner. Once again the Ships large ropes were thrown down, then fastened to the strong, little tug boats. The tug Captains navigated the big, old liner into the inner harbour and then pushed it into its berth where it would remain for 24 hours.

      Our long journey was just about over now and Freemantle was where a lot of the immigrant passengers disembarked. Patricia and her mother had some relations in Freemantle and she also had a school-teaching job that had been arranged for her before she left England. 

     I said my goodbyes to her and her mum and watched as they walked down the gangplank onto Australian soil. I felt a bit of sadness arise inside my  heart as I waved to them from the top deck. All I seemed to do in the last couple of months was say goodbye to people, not knowing whether I would ever see them again.


     As soon as all the disembarking passengers were safely ashore, the Pursers said that the remaining passengers could disembark now but not to forget the ship was due to leave Freemantle the next  morning on its way to Melbourne. That afternoon a few of us boys each put in some money and paid a Taxi man to drive us around Freemantle so we could at least have a glimpse of the place before we were due to sail. 

     What I remembered most about Freemantle was that it was a really beautiful city. The single-story Bungalows were not cramped together and every suburban house had a really beautiful flower garden growing in the front.

     At evening time we went back to the ship for dinner, then we walked around the docks and checked out the pubs and club scene. The youngest members of our group did not go into the bars. We were content just to look at the buildings and shops and whatever else there was to see.


     When we arrived in Mellbourne and unbeknownst to us boys, the Big Brother Movement had booked a couple of city tours for us. The Australian bus driver showed us all the old colonial buildings and the beautiful Botanical Gardens. We also saw the first house that Captain Cook was supposed to have lived in.

    It did not take much longer before we arrived in Sydney. Mi mother had kept in touch with Bruce Whipp and that evening he and his family came to the ship to pick me up, as promised. His promise to pick me up and show me around Sydney was the only link with England I now felt I had left. We drove over the Harbour Bridge to the Northside and back over the Bridge and then out to one of the Suburbs where Bruce and his family lived. Bruce had a very big house with lots of garden space, so I said to him,

     “You must be really rich now Mr. Whipp. This house must be worth a fortune.”

     “I wouldn’t go as far as to say we’re rich, mate, but we’re not too bad off. Life is a lot easier for us now that we’re living in Australia.”


     I told them all about my trip but it was nothing new to them as they had made the very same voyage a couple of years previous.


     “Wow! what’s that sitting on the stove Mr. Whipp?”, I said.

     “He had a good chuckle to himself as he watched my surprise.

     “It’s called a possum, mate. It’s a wild one. If we leave the kitchen window open, of a nightime, he comes inside and drinks his saucer of milk every evening before we hit the sack.”

      “I’d like a pet possum.” 

     “There’ll be thousands of ‘em where you’re going mate. You won’t need to have a pet one cause there in just about every tree there is.”


      I only visited Bruce Whipp and his family for about an hour because it was quite a long drive back into Sydney and he had to work in the morning, but I was so pleased that he’d kept his promise to me. It meant a lot at my age, connecting with someone from my past. When we got back to the ship I thanked them very much and said my goodbyes again.


      “Don’t forget to visit us sport, if ya ever comes down to Sydney again.”, said Bruce.

      “I will do Mr.Whipp and thanks again for meeting me.”

      “No worrys sport.”, he said as I watched his white Holden station wagon pulled away from the curb.


     That evening as I lay on mi bunk in the ships cabin I shed a few tears. I don’t really know why but that’s how it was


     The following morning we all said goodbye to our Escort Officer. He was not a bad chap really, and I felt quite compassionate towards him as he walked off down the gangplank. It must have been really hard for him, at times, trying to look after 16 young, headstrong boys who had just left home and were sampling their sense of newfound freedom.


ONTO THE TRAINING FARM


     At around 12 O’clock on the 23rd of April, the Big Brother Movement sent a large, single-decker coach to pick up all of us boys with the exception of Liverpool Bob who did not want to be sent out to the Bush to work. It was decided that he would work in Sydney as a mechanic so the Big Brother Movement could keep a good eye on him until he reached the age of 18. After 18 the BBM would no longer assume responsibility for any of us boys. I never really saw any of the BBM Directors so it felt like we were on our own, after they found us our first job in the Bush.


     All of our suitcases were loaded on the coach and the drivers headed out for the Suburbs to a small place called Cabbramatta. On the outskirts of Cabbramatta was a Dairy Farm which the BBM owned. That was to be our new home until we were able to get our first Bush job. The training farm was a very beautiful place which was surrounded by lush green fields. The large coach drove through a big double gate and up a dirt track road to the large Nisson hut where our quarters were. A couple of big Australian men were waiting to help us out with our cases and gear as the coach came to a halt. 

     

Once everyones’ gear was in the large barrack-type hut, I layed down on a wire-framed bed and took a bit of a breather. I had not been layed down very long before a big, booming voice rang out, 

     “All right you pommy bastards, get off those bunks and lets see what type of fucking rabble they’ve sent me this time. Line up at the bottom of ya’ beds! My name is Bill Defoe.”, he said as he strode down the hut.

      He stopped in front of one boy and said,“Jesus fucking christ, you sure are an ugly little bastard, son. What’s your fucking handle?”

     “Mi names Maurice.”, said the boy.

     “Is your father an ugly little bastard like you?”

     “Mi father’s dead.”, said Maurice.

     “Just as fucking well!”, said Defoe. “He’d have had a fucking heart attack looking at you, sunshine.”

     Walking down the line he stopped at another boy.

     “What’s your fucking handle?”

     “Dave.”

     “Can you work, Dave?”

     “I’ve been working for two years.”, said Dave.

     “I’ll bet you wouldn’t work in an iron lung, ya big pufta! Who curls ya fucking hair now ya sisters not around?”

     “No one, It’s natural.”, said Dave.

      When Defoe got level with were I was standing he took one look at me and said,

     “Gawd love a fucking duck! You should be still at home on your mothers tits. Who the fucking hell sent a little fucking worm like you out here!”

      “The BBM.”, I said.

     “Do you know how to wank yourself off yet, lad?”

     “Yes.”, I said as mi face went bright red and all the boys started to laugh.

     “Does spunk fly out of the end of your dick or are you still pumping air?”

     Everyone had a good laugh at that one.

     I declined to answer that question and he said, “OK you pommy, fucking bastards, follow me and I’ll show you around the place.”


     We all followed Defoe out of the hut and across the field to where the dairy parlour was. He showed us how everything worked, and as he went along, he attached jobs to every one. I was the only boy who never got a job and on the way back to the Nisson Hut he said to me, “Come here ya scrawny-assed little fucker. D’ya know what that building is?”

     “No.”

     “Well, that’s the cook house. You can helps Mrs. Blackwell to serve the meals and do the dishes .

     “Alright.”

     You can take some rest now and make fucking sure you’re all ready for work in the morning. Breakfast will be at 6 O’clock sharp! If you’re not out a’fucking bed, you’ll be in deep shit.”

     Everyone breathed a sigh of relief when Defoe strode off across the paddock to the Administration building.

     “Let’s go a get some rest before that big ugly bastard changes his mind!” said Dave.

     We lay on our beds and tried to get a bit of rest because, for sure, Bill Defoe was going to make it quite hard for all of us. Most of the boys were asleep but I found it very difficult to rest. I decided to go for a walk, over to the milking parlour. When I walked out into the back yard it looked like it had never been cleaned out for months. There was cow shit 6 inches deep all over it.

     Just then a voice said to me, ‘This yard looks very much like Spencers’ yard, but Spencer would never have a dirty yard like this one. Why don’t you grab that shovel and clean it all out.’

     ‘What a good idea.’, I thought. ‘It sounds as though I’m going to have a hard life over here so I’d might as well get started right now.”

     I worked real hard, non-stop, till the whole yard had been shoveled clean. It took me four hours to do it. As soon as all the shit had been stacked on the old shit pile I hosed the yard down with water. By the time I had finished there were blisters on mi hands and fingers. When I looked around the yard it was as clean as a whistle.

      I felt a great sense of accomplishment  so I went back over to the Nisson hut and took a well-deserved lay down.

     ‘Now I can rest.’, I thought. ‘I’ve earned one!     























  




  

Wednesday, August 25, 2021

AROUND THE SHOPS


BUS TRIP TO ROCHDALE


 “Come inside , wash your hands and face and get those dirty clothes off. We’re off to Rochdale to do monthly shopping.”

“Can’t I go like this mum?”, I said with a pouting lip.

“No you can’t.  If you think you’re going out with me in those clothes, with hands like that you’ve got another thing coming, my boy!”


The thought of washing and putting on clean, going-out clothes was not a pleasant thought but the idea of going on a shiny red bus to Rochdale offset the unpleasantness. I was soon scrubbed up and ready for the hour walk to bus stop and the two hour bus ride.


Pretty soon we were off up lane. I was already in one of my high and mischievous moods. I was already looking for something to do or someone to tease.  


The walk to the bus stop was quite a visual adventure. We walked up the lane and across the fields to reach the only main road around those parts. The grass was long and green and very thick.  Dotted all over the fields were masses of dandelions offset by big patches of daisies. A natural part of this beautiful scene were the big lumps of cow clap. Some of them were old and crusty, some of  ‘em were quite fresh and runny. 


As my sister was walking quite close to one of ‘em, a thought went through mi head. Just as I was going to give her a right good, accidental nudge into cow clap I heard Gods’ voice, in the shape of mi mother,

“I wouldn’t do that if I was you, you little monkey!”

I used to marvel at mi mum sometimes. She was a right-good mind reader.

“What mum?”

“You know. Don’t ever think about it!”


We walked on and got to the main road. Through the snicket and we were well on our merry way. As we walked down the road, into the bottom of the valley, we went across a small narrow bridge. It was very old and made of cobblestones. 


Mi dad said part of road, this side and ‘tuther were the remains of a Roman road. Roman roads are dotted all over Yorkshire moors.


At last, we reached our bus stop. Mum said bus comes on hour every hour till 9 at night. While we were waiting for next bus, I busied mi sen thinking about what I wanted in Rochdale from toy shop. Top of my list was a bow and arrow, a catapult or a real sword. Last of all, a bike. When I gave mi mum my ‘wanting’ list she said,

“Richard eating, always wanting summit’. You’ve got buckleys change of getting that me lad! Why can’t you be content with nothing. Why can’t you be content with just going for a bus ride. Do you think money grows on trees?”


A few years later, I tried to convince her it does.

“Hey mum, money is made of paper and paper comes from trees so it does grow on trees. No tress, no money.”

To my way of thinking this sounded quite logical but she wouldn’t have a bar of it.

“Don’t be impudent. I’m your mother you know!”


“Bus is coming mum! I want to sit on front seat mum, right behind driver.”

The bus conductress sits on front seat and she sometimes talks to me. As the bus pulls up we all pile on. I make a dive for front bench seat and off we go. Bus driver was a nice man. He spoke to me and mi sister, 

“Hello lad, off to Rochdale shopping with ya mum?”

“Yes.”. I sez, minding mi manners instead of saying ‘Aye’.

Mum was a right one for manners. She would always say,

“People with no manners show their ignorance.”


It was good fun on bus., climbing up and down back of bus seats.

“Sit down and behave!”, sez mum. “Or you’ll get a good crack!”


She threatened a lot. I’d already worked out how far to go before the thick ear came. 

“Can I give bus conductress money mum?”

“No!, you’ll end up dropping it.”

She eventually gives mi money and right on cue, I drop it all over bus floor. Pennies all over place. a couple of Tenners too and 3 three-penny bits. That made her screw her left eye up a bit and out flies another threat,

“You wait till I get you home boy! I’ll give you what for, showing me up on bus.”


The bus conductress thought it was quite funny. She gave me a slight smile when mum wasn’t watching. She was a little dumpy woman in a dark blue uniform. She had a jolly face and a nice smile. I once asked mi mum why she had a big bum. She took one look at me so I never pursued that line of thought any further. I satisfied my curiosity by thinking it was from sitting on the bumpy bus so much. 


When she finally found all the money, she pushed 4 levers on the ticket machine hanging around her neck and out popped the 4 different colored bus tickets. She handed them to me and said,

“Don’t lose them in case the inspector gets on. If you lose them you’ll have to pay again or get off the bus.”

Just then the hand of mum appeared and that was the last I saw of the bus tickets until we got home.




The big red bus wound its way all over the moors, past the dead sheep on side of road, past the peat bogs, bull rushes and other old farm houses. Sometimes going at that speed some of the small sticks or rusty tin cans that were lying on the moors turned into small toy sailing ships or others childs’ toy dreams.


The red single-deckers first stop was a town called Littleborough. This was my first glimpse at more than one shop, one of the many in a long line. Butchers shop, wood shop, clog shop and cobblers, furniture shop and grocery store. 

I was looking for a bicycle shop. Should be coming up. Ah! there’s one!

“Can I have a bike mum just like that red one?”

“No, you can’t!”, came the reply. “Sit down and behave.”


At that moment, the brakes squealed and the bus came to an abrupt halt in front of the bus stop. Some people were getting on the bus. I didn’t take much notice as I was still straining my neck, trying to see the bike shop off in the distance.

As I turned around to sit down properly, I got the shock of my young life. Sitting opposite me on the bench seat was a black man. It was the first one I’d ever seen. 


Everything stopped.


As I looked into his face I was stunned. It was jet black! His eyes were a little bloodshot and his hair was like fuzz. There were tight little curls all over his head. He had this massive nose that was flat against his face and those had two whopping big holes in them. As my frozen and shocked gaze slowly moved, I saw these two big lips. 


Right then and there I knew for sure he was the boogyman mum had told me about.

The boogyman who grabs naughty little boys who wander too far from home, out of their mothers’ sight. The very same boogyman who comes in the dead of night to see if little Yorkshire boys and girls are fast asleep. The very same boogyman who grabs little boys who go too close to the waters edge.


My eyes dropped lower down and stopped at his hands. They were the same color as his face. They were much bigger than my feet. His fingers were long and skinny. They seemed to have some white powdery stuff in the cracks of his fingers. His legs were at least ten times longer than mine. On his feet were these giant size boots. They were even bigger than mi dads’ wellies and mi dads’ wellies were big! I know because I used to put them on and try to walk around in ‘em. I’d take a few steps and trip over and mi dad would say,

“I think those wellies are a bit tight for you boy. They must be nipping your toes!”


My eyes slowly drifted all the way back up to his head. It seemed to go on forever. As my eyes reached his bloodshot eyes, he lit up like mi dads’ hurricane lamp. He gave me this great big smile. As his smile got bigger, these huge blue-looking lips opened up and I saw his teeth. They looked as big as mi mums’ goats teeth. Just then he said,

“Hello young man, what’s your name?” 

I froze even more,

“My name’s Jack. Are you going shopping with ya mum?”

I tried to speak but nothing came out. He just kept smiling at me. Just then, I felt this warm feeling in my heart. I was unfreezing.


“Don’t stare at people Richard, it’s rude.”, I heard mi mums voice say.

I turned to mi mum and said, in a shaky voice, “Why is that mans’ skin black? 

“Don’t be rude! Stop staring!”, she said.


Mi sister, who had been in as much shock as me, said,

“Why has that mans’ nose got big holes in it mum?”


Mi mum seemed to go red in the face for some reason. Her face was almost the color of the bus. I sez to her,

“What’s the matter mum? Are you alright?”

Then this deep, rich voice said,

It’s alright missus, they don’t mean no harm.”

He reached out his arms and picked up mi sister. He sat her on his knee and said to her,

“Hello, what’s your name then?”

She took one look into his face and started crying very loudly. He started laughing. Then the whole busload of people started laughing., except mi mum.  All she could say, in a quiet voice was,

“You wait till I get you home boy, showing me up like that!”

The black man said, “It’s alright missus. No harm done. My name’s Jack and I’m from Jamaica. You got a right load on your hands there missus.”


For the rest of the bus ride I tried not to look at him but I couldn’t help it. Every time I sneaked a look at him he caught me and gave me this big, toothy smile.







AROUND THE SHOPS



Rochdale was a city. I can’t say it looked much like other cities because at that point in time, I hadn’t seen any other city. As we got off the bus, mi mum grabbed ‘old of mi sisters’ hand and told me to hold her other hand. This was not what I had in mind at all. In my mind, I was already up the next block and round the corner.


Mi mum sez,

“First we’ll go and have a look around shops and then we’ll do shopping last thing so we don’t have to carry it around all day.”


This was one of the first times I’d heard mi mum make sense. Especially, since I knew I’d get lumbered with carrying a couple of shopping bags which was alright for a few minutes but after that I knew my hands would be aching.


“Hey mum, let’s go in here mum. Hey mum let’s go in there mum.” And on it went for half the day. “Hey mum, how come we look in your shop windows longer than mine?” When she was looking in a clothes shop window it was,”Hey mum, can we go now?”

The tension was starting to building nicely by now. 


Whilst she was looking in one of her shop windows, I got bored so I decided to go and find a more interesting shop window to look in. I was looking in a toy shop window at the toys when a couple of mums and their kids went past me, into the shop. Just then, I had a great idea. I followed them in as if I was one of the family. I spent, what seemed to me, a short time in the shop when all of a sudden this voice boomed out,

“What can I do for you, young man?”

I  looked up and saw a jolly-looking face with these round glasses perched on the end of a quite fat nose that seemed to have a reddish bubble on the end of it.

“Nothing mister.”, I sez and made a hasty back-paddle out the front door. The big doorbell clanged behind me.

“Phew!”


I went to the shop where mi mum was left standing and to my surprise, no mum! I had lost mi mum. Why wasn’t she there? She was supposed to be still standing in front of the shop window, according to my plan, but no mum! 

All at once the panic set in.

“I’m lost! What if I can’t find her? What if? What if? What if?”  

I started walking up and down the street but no mum and no sister. Just then, I heard a quiet voice in my head saying, 

‘If you get lost, stand outside the last shop you saw me at.’


I took off as fast as I could, making my way through all these people, to the shop where I last saw her.  No mum! As I was about to cry in fear, a hand from behind me grabs my ear,

“Where have you been you little  bugger? You had me frightened out of mi wits!”

All this time, she was pulling mi ear I didn’t feel a thing. I was so happy to see her. 

“Just for that, I’m tying you to your sister. I warned you mi lad, think I spend my time talking to misen?”

With that, she slips one of dog leads through me braces and ties ‘tuther end mi sister. What an embarrassment! I felt the whole of Rochdale was looking at me, expecting me to bite their  heels just like Lassie the Collie would.


“Hey mum, I want a pee.”

“You would!”, she sez. “Have one off ‘a side a’ pavement in that drain.”

“No! Everyone will see my willie!”

“If you pee your pants my boy, they’ll see more than your willie! They’ll see your red bum!”


How d’ya like that! Standing on pavement, tied to mi sister with dog lead, peeing in a drain hole and everyone looking at me and Iris saying,

“Come on, hurry up! I haven’t got all day to stand here with you! I’ve got shopping to do!”

A kid was walking past, staring at me, so I put mi willie away while It was still going. This wet the font of mi going-out pants. Next minute, I spots a hand flying through the air in the general direction of  mi ear. I just ducked in time and it shoved mi hair out of place which in itself was an unusual thing as I had it plastered down on mi head with mi dads’ liquid paraffin.


By this time, it was getting on in the day so I sez to mi mum,

“Hey mum, I’m hungry.”

“Alright, we’ll go round to market and have some fish and chips.”

Off we go! Fish and chips, I can’t wait!


As we went through marketplace there were stalls everywhere. It was packed with shoppers. Everyone looking for a bargain. The market workers were in full cry.

“Have a look at this ladies. A set of bone chine, made in England ladies. Come up a bit closer love, have a gander at this. Cast your peepers over the pattern. Top quality missus. Feel the glaze on these bread and butter plates, have you ever seen anything like that before? Non-breakables they are.”


‘So he sez’, I’m thinking too misen. ‘One good whack with mi dads’ claw hammer and it would be in bits, all over place. Why do people tell lies? Mum sez it’s not good to tell lies.’


“Now listen to me ladies, I’m not gonna ask you 4 quid for this whole set and I’m not gonna ask you 3 pounds 50. Show that lady the milk jug that goes with it Fred. Not  even 3 pounds for a top quality set of dishes. They're worth at least 2 pounds 50 ladies and I’m not even gonna ask you for that ladies. Give me 10 bob for lot and I’ll throw in one of these pure wool, hand-knitted tea cozies. It’ll go with tea pot love. Lady over there wants one Fred and a lady down front Fred. Come on ladies, I’ve only got 4 sets left. How can ya go wrong at this price love?”


This was the general patter at every stall. Chinaware, fruit stalls, vegetables, hardware, clothes stalls, building tools. You name it, Rochdale market had it.


On our way to Fish and ship shop, I decided that’s what I’ll do when I grow up. I’d might as well start practicing now!

“Look at this mm, finest quality knives and forks, ‘Made in Sheffield’ stamped on back of handle. Enough for 5 people. I’m not gonna ask you for 2 quid for these top quality knives and forks, although they’re worth it. Not even 10 bob or 5 bob. Give me sixpence mum and they’re all yours. I’ll even help you carry shopping home.”


This me mi mum laugh.


We made our way past the live chicken and duck stalls, past the pigeons, cats and puppies for sale and on to the Fish and Chip store. By this time, I’m starving.

“I’m starving mum.”

“You wouldn’t know what starving was Richard. We may be poor but  you’ve never gone hungry yet. Not like some people in this world.”


At long last ,into the Fish and Chip restaurant we go. This was my first time in a restaurant. The building was quite quaint. It was an older type probably easy 1900s’. The windows were the sliding sash kind. It had lace curtains across the center of window and to each side. The door was quite small, made of fancy carved wood. Inside, there were about eight tables that sat four to a table. Each table had a white cloth over it. Four wooden chairs were around tables for seating. We got a table near the wall. The waitress was an older lady, just like mum. She came over to our table and said,

“Hello missus, what can I get you and young-uns’ today?”




Mum ordered fish and chips, two half-orders and 1 full order. I couldn’t keep my hands still. I was trying to read the backs of the forks to see if they came from the market stalls. There was a fancy serviette cloth. I had no idea what it was. It looked like a fancy party hat to me but when I pulled it, it fell out into a big white cloth. I put it back on table and got a spare one from another table.


The waitress, who was a friendly lady, seemed to like talking to mum. I decided to check and see if the plates were also from the china stall. Wouldn’t read much so I studied the patterns. I lifted the plate up to see if there was a pattern on the back too.


To my great surprise, there, under the plate, was a sixpence. I couldn’t believe it! Seeing as mum was still talking, I slid the sixpence out from under the plate and put it straight in my short pants pocket. What a treasure, right under my nose. Now I had some money to buy something.


All of a sudden, the idea arose out of nowhere. ‘I wonder if there’s money under all the plates on the other tables?’


Right then mum said,

“Do you want to go to the toilet before dinner Richard?”

“No.”, I sez.

“No what?”

“No thank you  mum.”

“That’s better.”, she set.

“What about you Sheila?”

Same answer, “No.”

“No what?”

“No thank you mum.”

Mum sez, “Richard, look after your sisters till I come back. I’m going to toilet.”

“Yes mum.”

“And don’t get into trouble!”


The waitress takes mi mum out back to show her where toilet is. I couldn’t believe my good fortune.

I sez to my sister, when I showed her the coins,

“Look what I found.” 

My sister sez,

“Where’d you get that?”

“Under the plate.”

She goes and lifts up a plate and lo and behold there was another sixpence. We turned up two more plates and found nothing.

I sez to her,

“See all those empty tables with dirty plates on ‘em? Let’s go and turn some of them up and be careful nobody sees you.”


I check and make sure the coast is clear. It was, so away we go. We turned up all the plates and found lots more money. As I was walking round the tables and old man smiled at me, then he went back to reading his paper.

‘Oh good, he didn’t see.”

When there was no more money to find, we went back to our table. I said to her, 

“Give me all money and I’ll put it in mi pocket.”


When mum came back, I was sitting dead still. So was Sheila.

“What have you been up to lad?”

“Nothing mum, honest.”

“You’re both too quiet for my liking.”


Just then the fish and chips arrive. I was starving and excited at the same time. Mi sister was great, she never said a word. She’d probably forgot. She was more worried about drinking the dandelion and burdock drink that came with the fish and chips. 

Bread and butter, burdock, fish and chips. What a feast! And jam, to finish off with.


The waitress came and brought mum a cup a’ tea and then said,

“Will the be all for you today, missus?”

“Yes, thank you love. You can bring me the bill.”

The waitress came back with her pencil and pad. She added it all up and then said to mi mum,

“That’ll be 10 shillings and sixpence missus.”

Mi mum goes into her bag for her brown purse but before she can pull it out I pipe up and say,

“I’ll pay for it mum. Can I please?”

Well, Mi mum looks at me so I stand up and puff mi chest out, put mi hand in mi pocket and pull out a fist of silver coins. Then I put mi hand in other pocket and pull out more silver coins. I put ‘em all out on table. Mi mothers’ face just about fell off her head. The waitress looks at me too.


My mother sez,

“Where d’ya get all that money Richard?”

“I found it!”

“Where?”

“Under all the plates.”



Once again, the movie stopped. Then the waiters started laughing. 

“Those are my tips people left under plates for me, young lad.”

“I sez, “What are tips mum?”

“Tips are what you’re going to get when I get you home, boy!”

The waitress has another good laugh and sez,

“That’s a good lad you got there missus.”